Toronto Raccoons

The local wildlife welcomes you!They really do look like this. They also make an adorable sound that is a cross between dolphin clicks and a cat purr. I can never be mad at raccoons- they are just too darned cute. The Annex raccoons are excited to meet you!

Kids Are Quick!

TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America.
MARIA: Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
CLASS: Maria.
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TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
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TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?'
GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'
TEACHER: No, that's wrong
GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
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TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.
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TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
WINNIE: Me!
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TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
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TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with 'I.'
MILLIE: I is..
TEACHER: No, Millie..... Always say, 'I am.'
MILLIE: All right... 'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'
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TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand.
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TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
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TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?
CLYDE : No, sir. It's the same dog.
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TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD: A teacher

USA! USA! USA!

I don't think this one really needs a lot of work... They've pretty much nailed it already : )

The Final Throes and some Blow by Blows

The great day cometh! and with haste aplenty I find myself sat at my desk with four hours to go before I leave this cursed place for the last time. Orange has proved to be the turning point of my life although I'm sure it would be far too humble and bashful to attempt to state such a claim to my face. I arrived at Orange on the back of a Pro career in tatters, the skate industry dying and another ill-fitting relationship falling apart despite my best efforts.

I leave here a changed man; Equal parts strong, confident, sure of myself, patient, impatient, quiet, caring, tired, energetic... a conflicting mix of elements that are far greater than the sum. I feel that I have somehow been forged in the fire of the workplace at last and have emerged a smarter, savvier, more complete person for the experience. I found the love of my life; the single most perfect lady I've ever met who captivates me completely with the swing of her hips, the turn of her phrase, the silk of her touch and the smile in her voice.

I am one lucky so and so but its not always been easy; Orange has been at times a cruel mistress- denying holiday, demanding my evenings and producing some of the most fist-poundingly-frustrating days of my life.

Three years past, lessons learnt... Ready to emerge phoenix-like from the ashes of a crumbling call centre to a new future steering towards the light of the brightest star in the sky. x

Some email memories...

From: CLARKE, Joseph
Sent: 31 August 2005 17:10
To: BROOKS, Suzanne
Subject: Compliment from customer
Hi Sue, I receieved a call from Mr Hodgson who wanted to pass on a praise for Guy Crawford. Customer said he was very helpful and wanted him congratulated.
Cheers, Joe

From: Judy Hole
Sent: 24 July 2007 11:16
To: CHAFIK, Mehdi
Subject: thanks
Dear Mehdi, Many thanks for the work I believe you have done through Guy Crawford on my Broadband & telephone connections. Wonderful to have them both working again after a frustrating few months. With regards, Judy Hole

Why some men are still single:

Funny Notepads

26/07/2004 20:41:01 Helpdesk NT1
Applied £10.00 GW Good Will Credit adjustment to account. Gave customer £10 as he likes Will Young, I do too, he is smashing, customer wished to buy his latest CD so thought I would help him out with the cost.

27/07/2004 23:37:54 Helpdesk NT1
Applied £3.00 GW Good Will Credit adjustment to account. Me and customer both agreed that the non dd charge is a rip off, so credited back. £3.00

28/07/2004 17:41:51 Helpdesk NT1
Applied £16.63 GW Good Will Credit adjustment to account. Customer had called premium number to find love but got a tramp so agreed credit. £16.63

29/07/2004 00:42:12 Helpdesk NT1
Applied £10.00 GW Good Will Credit adjustment to account. Cust rec bill with odd pages missing, pointed out these were on the other side, credited 10.00 as he gave us a laugh.

30/07/2004 17:23:27 Helpdesk NT1
Applied £12.00 GW Good Will Credit adjustment to account. My team leader took eleven minutes forty seconds to come and talk to me so credited customer a pound for each minute she made him wait

30/07/2004 17:45:27 Helpdesk NT1
Applied £30.00 GW Good Will Credit adjustment to account. I am about to be sacked in 10 minutes so credited customer 30 as prize for being the last customer I speak to.

You will never crush the indomitable human spirit, no matter how much you micro manage the people out of the equation the geeks of the world will forever exist, filling company servers with their personalities and personal touches.

And that, as they say, is that. I have a very important phonecall to make in about twenty minutes and then comes the gradual slip and slide to 10pm... one final walk out through the revolving doors and the start of a new life.

Thankyou Orange and your employees for everything you have taught me, may each and every one of you find the happiness that I have discovered.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!

Hopefully little kittens have been bringing you birthday cupcake after birthday cupcake, and catering to your every whim!

Or maybe you are feeling low, weighed down by lack of family festivities and the heavier issues of the birthday paradox. Note: kittens cannot help you comprehend the magnatiude of this sort of thought process. Their solution to most problems is to lay down and get a tummy rub. More peanut butter jelly beans might help, too.

So, since I can't be there, here's a star that first became visible when you were born.

And an Audi R8. Wish I could get you a real one!

Happy birthday, my love.

x

J.

More Pictures

The sky at night... Can't quite get over it being this light at 10pm yet!


And my call centre manager just tapped me on the shoulder (I hid the internet guiltily) then gave me a bag of goodies! Talk about kind... She knows how much I love the party dips and sausage rolls : D


Mmmmmmmmmm : )

Ah, Sacriledge!

Dex's Love Cycle

Oh, thats COLD. Yet chillingly accurate!

Picture Post!

Soooo its been ages since I posted any pictures. I've been pretty hectic of late and I'm starting to mistrust the camera on my phone, so I'm taking less shots. Couple this with hours of overtime and you get a lot less photos than you should be taking!

Ginny and Natalie at the church, Iain doing all the work in the background.
Natalie was completely captivated by the vicar and behaved very well throughout the service; she's a different baby recently and fills the family with joy : )

The desserts... Lemon tart, Strawberry mousse and Boodles! My mum takes great pleasure in making puddings and always has- it balances my dad's love of cooking main meals perfectly.
Once for my birthday she made me a chocolate biscuit cake in the shape of a rollerskate, balanced perfectly on top of cake wheels with red sweet laces... I was the coolest kid in the world that day.

Is this not a picture of perfection? Spirally pasta salad with white sauce, red onions and walnuts matched with a massive slab of gammon and two pineapple rings, complemented finely with a locally crafted gin and tonic! Ahhhhhhh..... : )

Smartie goes fishing for frogs...

Lastly- I was in front of the tv last night eating the aforementioned splendid dinner when Polly gave me this classic photo opportunity...

I love my cats and I'll miss them, but I know that Gatsby or Yarn! will fill that space effortlessly.

Green Mangos with Salt

Today I stumbled upon Crunchable (Thanks wholly to Michael R. Duck) and began to read. After exploring some funny little stories such as this, this and this I stumbled upon a post by Dennis Wilson that was so vivid, so poignant that I felt compelled to share it. Having stumbled bleary-eyed to my desk for overtime and started wandering through the Crunchable site I clicked on Mr Wilson's writing. I felt like I'd had a bucket of cold water scooshed into my face. Life is so unpredictable, I can't wait to stop wasting time and share it with you.

Michael R. Duck

Michael R. Duck is an inventor and entrepreneur living in Nova Scotia. Working out of his basement in 1985, he created a machine that puts a precise amount of cream in a cup of coffee. Today, his company sells his “SureShot” machines throughout the U.S. and Canada; anyone who’s bought coffee at a Starbucks, McDonald’s, or 7-Eleven has probably used his invention.

"It began as a hobby, for almost five years. … I had a great job at the dairy, making great money, but I was making more money selling my machine. … I decided after five years of doing both, I was holding somebody else back at the dairy, and it was time to give one of ’em up. …"

"So by then, by 1990, I was still working out of my basement. I had one employee with me, part time. And we were probably doing $400,000 worth of sales out of the basement."

"Around late ’96, I started really formalizing the company, bringing in the office workers [and other employees.] By ’97, I was probably up to 11 people working out of the basement of my house, using 30 tons of machinery. We were doing a million dollars worth of sales out of the basement of the house."

Interview courtesy of another Mr Duck at Crunchable. So now you know! x

Googley Eyes

Such range! Such charisma! Such Googley Eyes!



Someone give that man an oscar! Oh, they did already : D

Shameless Meme!

1.) What was I doing ten years ago?
I was 18 (just) and carelessly failing my way through a series of exams on Biology and English. The summer before I'd discovered how much fun losing skin was through the medium of rollerblading and from that point onward my education took a serious turn for the worse.

2) What are five (non-work) things on my to-do list for today?
Mail out a Mac wifi card I sold on eBay, eat something, call Julie at 11am (6am her time), talk to my buddies about skating tomorrow, call the garage about my car and call Bill to make sure he's okay.

3) Snacks I enjoy?
Cold chicken breast slices, cheddar cheese, white chocolate and raspberry cookies, Peanut butter and jam sandwiches and chocolate of any denomination!

4) Things I would do if I were a billionaire?
I'd make sure that my closest friends and family were all comfortable, then I'd set about travelling, living modestly and soaking up cultures. I'd take my girlfriend and my skates with me.

5) Places I have lived?
Cardiff, Bristol.

6) Jobs I have had?
Pot washer (mushroom issues stemmed from here), teeshirt printer (not allowed to sit down despite being the only person in the store), complaints line staff (shouty welsh people -did we cut you off instead of your neighbour? oops), envelope stuffer (at least I didn't have to lick them), technical support (the geeks shall inherit the earth!).

&) Do you still sleep with a stuffed animal? We won’t laugh!
No, but I sleep with a rolled up teeshirt next to my face.

Q: Did you ever watch a scary movie that frightened you so much you were afraid of the dark afterward? I mean like you’re lying in bed trying to sleep, but you have to pee, but you’re scared to get up. It doesn’t have to be recently; could be when you were a kid. So what movie was it?
The Monster Squad. They blew up a werewolf with a stick of dynamite!

Q: What’s the last book you read that you thought was really super, inspiring, you’d recommend it to most anyone?
Actually nothing springs to mind- I've been churning through so many fiction titles recently but nothing really stands out.

So How's that Ebaying Going?

For the discerning Palm-lover in your life...

For your perusal- the Trio 800... big brother to the 750 : ) Available this summer? x

Another great reason to live in Toronto!

You hold events like this. How incredible?!?

My Me Mosaic

The Questions:

1. What is your first name? Guy
2. What is your favorite food? Rare Steak
3. What high school did you go to? Sidcot School
4. What is your favorite color? Blue
5. Who is your celebrity crush? Natalie Portman
6. Favorite drink? Gin and Tonic
7. Dream vacation? Russia
8. Favorite dessert? Boodles Orange Fool
9. What you want to be when you grow up? Together
10. What do you love most in life? Julie_Darling
11. One word to describe you: Bold
12. Your flickr name: twoceeveeandme





1. Lemon, 2. Friday Night Steak, 3. Sidcot lawn, 4. wham:a different corner, 5. The cast of Star Wars, 6. Toledo, gin-tonic, 7. April Snow in Red Square, 8. dessert, 9. Two at the evening sun, 10. Julie Darling, 11. bookshelf spectrum, revisited, 12. us

You are my choice for 10. Skating isn't really anything more than another part of myself with plastic boots on... so you're what I love most in life.

Me Mosaic

On the many knit blogs I stalk, this little game is currently making the rounds. It's basically making a photo mosaic of the things that visually represent who you are.

The Concept:

a. Type your answer to each of the questions below into Flickr Search.

b. Using only the first page, pick an image.

c. Copy and paste each of the URLs for the images into fd's mosaic maker.

The Questions:

1. What is your first name? Julie

2. What is your favorite food? toast

3. What high school did you go to? Sudbury Secondary Schoool for the Performing Arts

4. What is your favorite color? green

5. Who is your celebrity crush? Clive Owen

6. Favorite drink? gin and tonic

7. Dream vacation? The Dalmation Coast

8. Favorite dessert? creme brulee

9. What you want to be when you grow up? Writer

10. What do you love most in life? Everything*, can't pick just one

11. One word to describe you: catalyst

12. Your flickr name: teamknit

1. Happy Birthday Julie!!, 2. toast bed (double divan), 3. DSC03094, 4. Nant Ffrancon and Glyder Fawr, Wales, 5. OUT903958, 6. Gin & tonic, 7. Life Is Beautiful, 8. Crème Brulée, 9. writer's teeth, 10. Go get your morning bean, 11. Cisco's One Millionth Catalyst 3750 Switch, 12. Julie Darling

* how do you pick? I love you, and weekends, and late nights, the sparkly ceiling, and laughing, and being silly, and thinking about the big stuff, thinking about little stuff, and knitting, and music, and driving. I love my life. I've got no complaints, expect that it would be better if you were here.

Lock up your (grand)sons...

Wow, kind of puts things in perspective a bit, doesn't it? I personally believe the lady should have quit the game after "Ray of Light"; I think she should maybe consider putting a bit more time into being a mum instead of being frightened of letting go of her youth. There's something incredibly unattractive about a senior citizen working out 8 hours a day to keep her physique. I'm happy to grow old gracefully... my parents are doing it, my grandparents have done it- its kind of a family tradition, you know?

Also a certain someone had a SATC party the other night... I've yet to see the film but I think that it'd have to work pretty hard to dispell my unshakeable opinion on the matter!